The “town” (I say this in quotes because we have a Mayor and City Council, but our town is only houses and families…no services…seems funny to me!) has a community yard sale day twice a year; yesterday was the latest. It marked the 5th time we’ve participated, although on a much smaller scale than in years past. I kept the door open for only two hours, rather than six, but it felt so good to move some of our things on to others who will find them useful, even though we don’t, any longer.
In recent months, I’ve had a very strong need to clean things out, both literally and figuratively. I’ve been cleaning out my closets and drawers, throwing things away, and sending stuff to Goodwill and Salvation Army with the hope that someone else may get some good use out of the things I no longer need, want, use. Some days, this need is so strong, it’s a physical vibration (well, this makes sense if all things are energy, flowing into and out of things, then it’s just my frequency responding…) and I am compelled to clean, sort, and toss.
It feels much better to have what I need and use, and not be confronted with too many choices about what to wear and use each day.
There used to be a time when my purchases were based on what they cost, not necessarily on quality or value. These days, I am in a position to think less about cost and base decisions on quality and value, and it’s a much better place, to be sure. Take my wardrobe, for instance. I’ve never been a fashion plate, leaning more toward the comfortable than the latest fashions. I want what I buy to be things I truly love, feel good in, and know I can wear for years — both because the styles will still be fine, and because they are of such a quality that they will still be in great shape for some time.
What does this have to do with personal growth and leadership, you are probably asking yourself. Well, here’s the parallel, at least in my mind.
As I get older, I’m more focused, more in tune with myself and what I need to be a whole, healthy, happy person who is able to contribute and add value to others. As with the things in my closets, cupboards, and drawers, I am also taking stock of who I am, what I have to offer, how I want to spend my time, and with whom I want to share it.
One of my mentors, John Maxwell, shares that at the end of each year, he takes a week off to review how he spent the past year, before he plans for the coming year. He considers each person he’s spent time with in terms of whether the relationship was positive, one that added value to his life and lifted him up, or whether it was one of those relationships that suck the life out of you (my words, not his!). Based on this reflection, he decides who he wants to spend more time with in the coming year (think ‘life energy’) and who he will spend less (or no) time with in the future. He follows the same pattern with engagements, meetings, and other activities.
John understands that this is not a dress rehearsal. We get only one shot at this thing we call life and he wants it to be a quality experience. Me, too!
I want to spend my time with quality, like-minded people. I need to spend time with people who are better at the things I want to learn and in the areas in which I want to grow. I need to read good books; ones that make me think, expose me to new ideas, challenge my perceptions about what is possible, and allow me to learn from others’ experiences. This is not to say I don’t read the occasional frivolous fiction (I can’t help but lose myself in the ridiculous world of Stephanie Plum from time to time!)…but the point is, I am working on being more intentional about how I spend my time and who I spend it with.
I know many people think in terms of “spring cleaning,” but fall has always been a time of renewal for me. Although, I suspect, this will be an on-going process for me from now on, as each day I understand more fully that growth in any area is a daily process, a daily activity…not just something one does for some pre-determined amount of time (four years of college, perhaps…) and then is done. The thing is, I’m not done, and doubt I ever will be.
My questions for you are these:
When do you take stock of your life and how you are spending your life energy?
How often, and how frequently, do you spend time in reflection?
Does that time reinforce the good and right in your life?
Does it lead you to explore new paths, and make changes?
Are you any closer to understanding the difference between need and want?
