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Intentional Leadership — D5, W2, M9 — Attitude

I don’t know about you, but this week seems to have gone by fairly quickly. Yes, I know, some of us had Monday off for the Labor Day holiday, so it makes sense, as the “work week” was shorter than usual…but my days felt as if they went by slowly, so how it’s Friday already is a bit of a mystery to me!

I did accomplish a lot, however; I am caught up with my Maxwell Growth Plan, and have finished re-reading The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth. It really is a great book; in fact, I think I’ll organize another Mastermind Group on this one soon, as there is much to be gained from it, if one is willing to do the work. In reviewing the 15 chapters, here is where I think I’m at:

Laws of Intentionality and Awareness — feeling pretty strong with these two, as they are the two key topics I teach on as the foundation for growth, leadership, better communication, building healthy teams, and greater success and satisfaction in whatever you choose to do with your life.

Law of the Mirror — I used to expect others to add value to, or invest in, me before I did so myself. This may seem like a good plan; in fact, we might think it’s someone else’s responsibility — like maybe our employer’s. Let me tell you, though, if you wait for someone else to value you, you may be waiting a long time. If you set a low price/value on yourself, you can’t expect others to raise it. So, now I am well aware of the value I bring to any situation and I am the first to invest in me.

Law of Reflection — surprisingly, I need to invest more time in this area. I do take time to think and reflect, but not often or long enough, of late. I’ve been feeling a little scattered and overwhelmed. I think it’s for good reason, at some level, as I have access to so much great content to teach, material to learn from (I have no fewer than 45 books on my bookshelf today that I’ve not read, yet, and am in the middle of four books right now), a talented and generous team of mentors and coaches to learn from. I need to spend some quality time in reflection and get myself back on a focused, purposeful path.

Law of Consistency — another area I am working on. I do many of the things I need to do to move myself forward, but not always as consistently as I know I can.

Law of Environment — I am blessed in this area. Being part of the John Maxwell Team, I am surrounded by approximately 2,700 coaches around the globe who share my passion, are also in growth-mode, and are at varying stages of progress in building businesses and serving clients.

Law of Design — another area I’m working on. I have some great systems in place in some areas of my business, but have opportunity to develop and implement a few more that will greatly benefit me.

Law of Pain — managing bad experiences for growth. Have had my share of these, to be sure, and my philosophy is this simple: If I’m still waking up every day, even after something happens that I may have thought was devastating, then clearly I have work to do, so I better learn the lesson and get back at it! I’m not saying it’s easy or painless, but I simply don’t know what else to do!

Law of the Ladder — this one is focused on building one’s character. I’m certainly not perfect. As John Maxwell often says, “Each of us is just one step away from stupid!” I’ve made a number of blunders throughout my life, and I’m sure I’ll make more. I strive to be a person of integrity, honor, and authenticity. I do my best to do it right (with increased self-awareness and intentionality!) the first time, and am quick to acknowledge and make amends for my goofs.

Law of the Rubber Band — I recognize that if I am in a place of no tension, then I am not growing. Rubber bands are useful only when they are stretched, and I am not growing if I am not stretched. I think I’m pretty well in this area.

Law of Trade-offs — one must give up to grow up! I do well here, as well. I’ve traded what many might consider “fun” time (camping, bar-b-ques, outings, etc…) to study, train, coach, teach, read, write, etc…I’ve also invested a lot of money into my growth, especially over the past couple of years, rather than spending it on material things, trips, or even putting it in savings. It’s an investment in me and my future, which I have full confidence will return great dividends over the course of my life.

Law of Curiosity — let’s just say that my level of inquisitiveness has been annoying to some! But I refuse to stop exploring, seeking truth and understanding, and, yes, continuing to ask “why?” until I understand something!

Law of Modeling — finding a model or mentor to learn from. Again, I have the faculty on the John Maxwell Team, John Maxwell, the other 2500 John Maxwell Coaches, a number of gifted authors, and others I actively learn from daily.

Law of Expansion — is about increasing one’s capacity for growth and, in turn, for serving others. This is my calling, my passion, my focus.

Law of Contribution — be a river (let what comes into your life flow thru you to serve others) rather than a reservoir (keeping everything that comes to you only for yourself). Again, my purpose, passion, calling…I seek opportunities daily to pour into others.

So, there’s my assessment of my progress and areas of focus within my growth plan at this point. That may be more than you are interested in, but there it is!

So, on this Friday, I will be meeting some new people whom I anticipate being able to add value to in the areas of communication, conflict resolution, and team-building. I have a coaching session in the afternoon. Then, I will be looking to the weekend. I plan to jump onto a conference call with a number of other coaches who are also teaching the Empowerment Mentoring lesson series to learn more about teaching through story-telling. I have some writing to do, will build in some reflection time, and have some family time.

Of course, there’s the need to look ahead, planning for the week, so I am set up for success when Monday morning comes, and I have a couple of workshops to plan for in the coming weeks.

What about you? How will you spend your weekend?

What and who need your attention?

What do you need to do to nurture yourself?

What could you be doing to prepare yourself for success next week and in the coming weeks?

However you choose to spend your weekend, I hope you make it intentional and with a positive attitude!

“See” you Monday!

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Intentional Leadership — D2, W2, M9 — Attitude

Let’s spend some time on a personal inventory today. Get out your journal and list three people in your personal and professional lives that have impacted you; include both positive and negative influences.

Make two columns on a page, one headed Personal Life, one headed Professional Life.

List three people in each column and place a – (minus) or a + (plus) next to each name, based on their influence on your life. Then answer the following questions:

What common threads do you see among those who were positive influences?

What common threads do you see among those who were negative influences?

When you evaluate your current circumstances, in both your personal and professional lives, is your attitude the same, or different, in each aspect? Describe your current attitude in both areas of your life.

As we’ve discussed, there are times when the only thing we can control is our attitude. When you look at the areas above that you marked as negative, wht choices can you make to be more positive in those circumstances?

One of the more positive influences in my life was Mac Bledsoe (if you’re a football fan, you might know him as Drew Bledsoe’s dad). Mac was a teacher when I was in high school, as well as the football coach. He taught a few classes, but the one that made the most impact on me was a class he called “I Can” and it was based on the philosophies and teachings of Zig Ziglar. It’s been 30 years since I was in school, but I can still remember Mac and the many lessons he taught me, as if they were just last year. Thank you, Mac!

I look forward to hearing what you’ve come up with through this exercise.

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Intentional Leadership — D1, W2, M9 — Attitude

Over the course of your life, you will experience a variety of things that will have the power to influence your outlook in both positive and negative ways. As I suggested last week, as we started this month-long focus on attitude, each of us gets to choose how we interpret and react or respond to each of those events.

When I was in high school, I was active in student government, wrote for and eventually became editor of the school newspaper, and was very active in planning school events, like homecoming week. We also had a program called Jr. Miss. This was a national program, and while it might appear to be a pageant program, it is based on scholarship, personality, and talent — not on beauty, and there was no swimsuit competition!  Girls were invited to participate in the program during their Junior year of high school; the winner would spend the year representing her community at other pageants, in parades, county fairs, local events, at a variety of speaking engagements, and competing at the state level pageant (the winner of which would compete at the national competition that was held, at that time, in Mobile, Alabama).

My perspective on Jr. Miss was that it was something the popular, wealthy girls won. I had my share of friends, to be sure, and was included in a lot of things, but was never in the “in” crowd, and certainly was not from a wealthy family. But, when I received the invitation to get involved, I said, “What the heck! This looks like fun!” Of course, I never expected to win.

In fact, at the time, I was also running for student body president for my senior year of school. That was truly where my attention and energy was focused. And for a while, I was the front runner. My opponent was a girl who rubbed a lot of students the wrong way. Part way through the campaign, she switched places with the person who would have been VP, had she won, and he was much more liked by most of the school.  So, with him in the President position, and her in the VP position, the vote was much closer, and I lost by a few votes.

I was crushed! I really wanted the position. And yet, the Jr. Miss pageant process was still on-going. Because I was participating in this on a lark, as they say, you can imagine my surprise — and delight — when I actually won the Jr. Miss position!  Remember, it wasn’t what I most wanted, but I determined to make the best of it.  I choose my attitude, deciding to learn what I could, represent my community well, and sharpen some skills that I knew would serve me well later in life.

It offered me the opportunity to travel around certain regions in my state, visiting with a lot of people I never would have been in contact with in other circumstances: Community leaders, local legislators, other students, and people younger than me. I had the opportunity to speak at fairs, other pageants, in front of civic organizations, at schools, parades, and at community events. I was able to influence other young girls who were interested in growing and taking on bigger challenges. And I received scholarship funding for college, and who wouldn’t be thankful for that?!

All of these skills and experiences have served me well ever since. And I’m thankful for having had the opportunity to participate, and for all of the opportunities I’ve had since then. Had I chosen to wallow in self-pity over my defeat during the student body elections, I would have stunted my growth, at least for a while. I could have become angry, bitter, etc…I’m so thankful I didn’t.

What experiences have you had that have influenced your life and your attitude? Write them down.

Outline whether they were negative or positive and what you did or didn’t do as a result?

What gratitude do you have, or what regrets do you carry, as a result?

How do these experiences influence who you are today?

Whom are you influencing with your attitude and how you respond to the events in your life, both good and bad?

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