Posts

Work-Life Balance is a fallacy!

If you work full time, you are likely all too aware that there is no such thing as “work-life balance.” It’s a fallacy, a lie, an illusion, a figment of someone’s overactive imagination, a blatant untruth! Balance implies some equality on each side of the scale, some level of fairness of the elements being measured.

Think about it. We all have 24 hours a day. We sleep 7-8 hours. We are at work, typically, between 8-10 hours each day. What about your commute time? Maybe 30 minutes round trip, possibly even an hour? So far, that’s about 15.5 hours on the short end and up to 19 hours on the long end of the range.

What about time to eat, exercise, run errands, read, reflect, play… Time for extra-curricular activities — either your children’s or your own — volunteering, sitting on a Board for another organization, taking classes…

Don’t forget about time for your family! Yep, that’s the important one, isn’t it? We all say family is our highest priority and yet they are often the people who get our leftovers in terms of time and energy.

We’d like to think we could have it all, but we know it’s not possible. Even the influential and powerful discover this — if they are lucky! Read this story about Erin Callan, former CFO of Lehman Brothers, as she discusses the sacrifices she made in terms of her marriage and family in exchange for the prestige, power, and money afforded by her position. Was it really worth it?

What if you were introduced to an entirely different concept: Mastery of the art of living. Try this on for size:

A master in the art of living draws no sharp distinction between his work and his play; his labor and his leisure; his mind and his body; his education and his recreation. He hardly knows which is which. He simply pursues his vision of excellence through whatever he is doing and leaves others to determine whether he is working or playing. To himself, he always appears to be doing both. — LP Jacks

What if you could master the art of living? It’s possible, you know? It’s not effortless, but wouldn’t it be worth it?

The key is (is this familiar?) having a high level of self-awareness — understanding your values, priorities, and dreams — and intentionality — deliberately making decisions and taking steps that lead you to the place you long to be, honoring your values daily.

My recommendation…find a mentor or a coach who has been along this path before you and enlist their support in your quest.

Let me know how I can help…before it’s too late.

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Intentional Leadership — D5, W4, M2 — Relationships

Here we are, come to the end of another week, that to me feels like it has flown past — again! It’s a sign I’m getting busier, which is good. But I need to remain aware of whether I’m spending my “busy” time simply being busy or actually productive. This weekend will be a good time for me to reflect on that, and redirect — if need be — my efforts next week…a slight course correction, if you will.

Right now, though, let’s focus on the weekend. Are you ready? Have you gotten into the habit of thinking about it and preparing for it ahead of time, yet?

What relationships do you need to nurture this weekend?

I need to spend more time with my husband.

Are there new relationships you would like to initiate?

I do have some new connections I want to make and will give some thought this weekend to how best to initiate them.

What do you need to do to focus on and nurture yourself this weekend?

A bit of alone time. I’m working on my “I have a Dream” speech assignment; it’s part of the Deeper Path Coaching Cohort I’m working my way through. I will be reading my Dream speech to my fellow travelers on the Path…It will be an interesting experience. I’ve carried so many of these thoughts around with me for a long time, but rarely verbalize them to others.

How much rest do you need this weekend?

How much – and what kind of – activity do you need?

What loose ends do you need to tie up from this week?

What do you need to do to prepare yourself for a great start to next week, preparing for Monday?

Finally, what thought are you giving to things you have planned or need to prepare for or complete in the coming months?

On Monday, we begin month three —  focus on Excellence. More thoughts on this over the weekend.

Have a great weekend, and I’ll “see” you soon!

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Intentional Leadership — D1, W2, M2 — Relationships

This week we are going to explore the potential we see in others.

How familiar are you with the story of Helen Keller?
She was unable to see and hear, and consequently, to speak. As a child, her parents brought in a tutor, Miss Sullivan, to teach her.
Miss Sullivan turned out to be most creative, perhaps even unconventional, in her methods for teaching Hellen to learn letters and words. She tried to “sign” a pattern of letters into Helen’s hand, but Helen failed to grasp their meaning.
Finally, Miss Sullivan took Helen out to the water pump in the yard, and held her hand under the running water. In her other hand, Miss Sullivan drummed out the patterns of the letters of the word “water;” Helen stood transfixed, feeling the water run over one hand while he focused on the pattern of the letters being tapped out in her other hand. It was ingenious!
Helen’s progress in learning was quite accelerated; she mastered a complex vocabulary, eventually learning to write — both the standard alphabet and in Braille. She even learned to speak.
She went on to graduate from college, wrote fourteen books, traveled to numerous countries, met a number of world leaders and served as an Ambassador for the American Foundation of the Blind.
It’s a miraculous story; one that would never have happened had Anne Sullivan not been brought in to tutor Helen, and had she not recognized Helen’s potential. The moral of the story: When we see the value in others, we have an opportunity to help them achieve great things.
Think back over the course of your life. Who believed in you?
What did they do to encourage you to stretch and go farther than you may have thought possible?
How did they demonstrate their belief in you?
Had they not believed in you — or didn’t demonstrate that belief — what impact would that have had on your life?
Who have you seen unrecognized potential in?
What did you do to nurture its growth?
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